Autonomy, boundaries, what is that all about

Autonomy, what is it really all about?  Do we even care anymore who is peeping in our windows?  Think about this in terms of the cyber-revolution.  There once was a time when we regarded our own personal space, as a personal space.  No one really knew what went on behind closed doors.  There was a reason for that.  It kept us all in check.  Shrouded were the mysteries of the individual and contained in a place that only few, if any held a code, a password to.  I am curious as to how many male-owned computers are free from pornographic favorite sites?  Are there any that are free from at least a visit or two to, either intentionally or by accident, as men are targets of porno sites? I am not stereo-typing, nor am I judging, I am being direct and honest.  It is all too real.  There is no escaping it, and because someone at some point in our history said, it is normal, just get a man aroused and you’ve got his business. No one wants to really focus on the truth in all of this, but, it is a form of victimization.  We are all being prostituted in order that someone makes a quick buck.  The brains, the genius that could be engineering ways in which to make third world countries meld into the rest of the world and ultimately break the cycle of circumstantial ignorance is wasted on ways to make the world come into the bedrooms of computer owning, cyber-space playgrounds, anti-social little kids refusing to grow up!  

The big pimps of the cyber-world, seemingly innocent men and women of their silicon reality that tap into the human psyche and need for acceptance, the ego, to develop sites intended for communication are at work.  Seriously, aside from Oprah Winfrey who needs millions of autonomous relationships to maintain her multi-million, (or is it billion?) empire, who really need to claim we have hundreds of friends?  (for those of you who have never visited myspace, the “social Network King”, do a little browse action, take notice of how many cleavage bearing, ass perking, titillating femme fatales there are on the average dude’s site.  It is “collector” heaven!)  Check out how many women seek to have the multitudes of friends, (I wonder how many of them lacked friends in high school?  Were they the wall flower that came into her own through the net, or was she the homecoming queen who developed and spent her quota of friendship and popularity even before she became a sorority girl) Ask yourself if it is possible for any one person to seriously send out loving messages and pictures of cute little hands holding hearts, signed xoxoxo to the variety of male “friends” on the site, and be fully innocent.  My mother always told me that a person’s action in public is only a small indication of what is going on in hiding.  So if someone is posting cute little hand holding heart toting pictures, wishing another a sextacular day, then there is a pretty good chance there is dialogue going on in the private line that surpasses the coy little marking of the territory.  Boundaries of “friendships” are being crossed! I know all of this because I spent a few months aggravating the hell out of myself on that site, only to agonize that there were far too many people attempting to recapture what we are by nature supposed to mature past! 

It was my intention to connect with people I am already connected with, now how silly is that one.  That is why I joined myspace, but it became too much of a wrong thing. Boy how is that for psycho babble!  I am no longer on that social realm, but I am now pulled into the blogging phenomena.  It is my way to fulfill a dream of being a writer, a journalist, the author, of course with a degree of autonomy.  That is what writers do.  Can you imagine if every author seriously sought to become intimate with every reader what that would be like?  But, isn’t that to some degree what we do when we post blogs, bulletins to our myworld sites? Maybe I will actually become a legitimate one someday.

Then there is the issue of time.  The number of hours spent on social networking, dating sites, blogging, etc., could quickly become the biggest majority of the day.  Those who update weekly their pages, like cyber redecorating your house, I must wonder, can a person actually hold down a 40 hour a week job, social obligations, church (presuming there is time) eating, exercise, sleep, oh and lest I forget, actually relationship building, (oh sugar, we can’t forget other normal bodily functions)? The potential damage that could result in the workplace, the homespace, the bedroom, the marriage, how often have people stepped into dangerous territories by escaping into the “multi-task” justified existence?  There once was a time if things were not going well in a relationship people would escape to the store, the basement for pondering, into a book, into a moment of silence, an attempt at reconciliation would have some degree of a chance, autonomous, safe zones.  But now, if there is a conflict, a need for diversion there are a bounty of “friends” just waiting to hear from their “myworld friend” and they are only a hit away.  Before you know it, the wounded soldier is hearing glorifications from a cleavage toting femme, de la crème in, Comeonover Ohio…or the scorned Sally is being lulled, by “but baby, there ain’t no way I’d treat you like that” from a muscle pumping, poetry whistling, flower in hand comment conniving, nere do well in Layitonme Iowa! 

“Autonomy through automation”, is not autonomy, it is actually becoming the antithesis of such.  We have this amazing vast internet explosion before us a world literally at our fingertips, but there is no “protection” in any of it.  We freely post pictures of ourselves in vast circle, all because our ego’s demand it.  Yet, anyone in the world can capture a personal picture and save it, then repost it, and ultimately use it for their purposes.  Do we even know whose wallet, cachet that we are stuffed into? Being potential targets of one who would use us in a matter that we would not approve seems fleeting, we are being desensitized.  Considering that we can zero in on our old neighborhood through GPS tracking systems and possibly even see Mrs. Jones rocking in her chair on her front porch, could leave Mrs. Jones troubled.  How do we know we are not going to show up in a year or two featured in some bizarre, bored techi’s fascination?  I can see it now, bathroom GPS! There once was a time when a person had to give permission for their materials to become public domain, now, we are a free society, aren’t we?  That is what we wanted right, freedom?  Well, freedom has a price.  With freedom comes a loss of privacy.  A loss of privacy, hmmm, that is funny, and ironic.  We will march up and down the street toting signs asking for an end to governmental intervention into our private lives.  We blast the President for the inception of the Patriot Act. We are losing our right to privacy.  We declare it unfair that Washington is searching for tags, keywords in order to identify who is doing what, yet all of us on the net are prescribing to that same process. I guess loss of privacy is all okay when it is for fun, for diversion.  Is it trespassing, boundary violation?  I will leave you with this little story.  A friend of mine was on the “social network”, his site was not set as private.  He freely posts the little comments made to him by his “harem” oops, sorry, his “friends” and when I asked him where this was all leading for him, he actually told me that I was not welcome to look at his comments…they were his business. That is like posting a video on youtube and telling the world, “it is just for me to see, no one else should look.”  Give me a break, autonomy, shmonomony!  We have given it over to pimps of the social network playground. 

“Autonomy through automation” ~ “auto” yes, it is becoming automatic that we blend the private with the public without regard to healthy boundaries.  I fear the damage is potentially cataclysmic and yet to be seen.  Unlike the damage of social revolutions of the past taking decades to see the aftermath, the speed at which the current “auto” revolution is at the speed of light through the filaments that we vastly ascribe.

The quote “autonomy through automation was borrowed Walter Kern his full article can be viewed at: 


changing with the tides and riding the wave

SoapBlogging, the intentional soap boxing arena that allows for the individual writer, in this case ME, to write freely, not caring one iota as to whether or not anyone reads the banter of one who has so much to say!  Today I am reminded of how haphazard the world really is, and unpredictable too.  Recently I was forced into yet another career change.  I would love to blame myself, my lack of attention, inability to communicate, undesirable appearance, lack of insight into the needs and wants of the world around me, lack of fighting spirit, and the list could go on and on.  But, after a second thought, (and believe me it takes little to no time to come to this conclusion) I embrace this reality…jobs, career, friends, family, are much like marriage.  Sometimes you just come to the conclusion that there is a lack of cohesiveness, continuity, personality conflict, in short, “it just don’t work!”  Now that is not to remove blame, as many times there is just downright evil at work!  If you are intentionally cheating, lying, stealing, philandering whether in a marriage, or even with another co-worker, (it is not what you think, I will fill you in later) then, well, a negative begets a negative! So here is ME, back to the drawing board, starting over.  This time, will I get it right, so…just Kottke shared in today’s blog It is my fondest wish that my lack of perfection, my degree of imperfection, will actually be my “ace in the hole” my signature mark. It is today that I start anew and truly endeavor to become the SoapBlogging queen of 2008, the writer extraordinaire, the guiding light to all those lost souls on the internet seeking some degree of value in the written word.  It is through our dialogue, our discourse that we will come together in the “third place.”  It is with a strange degree of sadness and relief that I forge into this phase of my life with a whole lot of knowledge regarding the disparity, the condemnable reality of the health care crisis, with an emphasis on hospital’s role in the pillaging of the uninsured and a lack of understanding that asks, so now what do I do with this insight?  Stay tuned, you will probably find out!     

SoapBlogging 101

Soap boxing defined by is; ””To engage in impromptu or nonofficial public speaking, often flamboyantly.Idiom: on one’s soapbox, speaking one’s views passionately or self-importantly.”

 In the tradition of the great American discourse, we discover that “soap boxing” was used to get the crowd listening.  The oral tradition was in many ways, the best way to be heard.  Illiteracy has been a weakness of the United States throughout its history, and as a result the oral tradition was necessary.  The message would be spread through a passionate, emotive transfer of ideas.  Every major political movement of the past 2 centuries was spread more by the fire of the tongue, than that of the fire of the pen.  We still see that to be true in the form of mass media, television, talk shows, news networks, etc. Soap boxing has taken on many forms.  The lost art of orator, by way of spreading ideas has not really gone away, but rather, it has been transcended into new form of delivery.  I believe the term soap boxing has morphed into a new form; Soap Blogging. Soap Blogging represents that “third place” phenomena that Ray Oldenburg describes as, ””the core settings of informal public life”. (Oldenburg, 16)As the pub, church, and other free or inexpensive local third places have disappeared, for many of us the feeling that community is lacking has increased. Third places, according to Oldenburg, are necessary for community to arise. They are places where members of a community interact with others and come to know the ties which they have in common.”  (taken from Robert Paterson’s The Death of the “Third Place” and the Birth of Virtual Community). We now have what I determined to be a replacement of the “third place”, the internet.  We now, through use of the social-network, “soap blogging”, we now stand upon our virtual soap-boxes, and send out our thoughts, feelings, messages with a speed that could not have been imagined by our founding mother and fathers. Will it ever take the place of total human interaction?  I hope not, I believe that there are no wordsmiths out there that can truly deliver the meaning of flashing eyes, until you have actually gazed into a set.

It is my belief that soap boxing has been expanded to “soap blogging.” ME is hereby the queen of soapblogging!